Basking like a lizard....

Yesterday, despite all the work i have to do for Desert Medicine Woman Herbals, i decided to take the day off and go for a good hike in the mountains. My friends and I headed up to the top, near Summerhaven and headed down the Sunset trail to Marshall Gulch, and then on to the Wilderness of Rocks trail. It was a good 8 mile round trip that took most of the day.

As I usually do, I stopped to look at plants and take pictures, and found several new plants that I need to indentify. One in particular smelled just like pinapple sage, but it wasn't a salvia at all!
Down in the gulch i found mountains of Arizona Valerian, and so stopped to taste some leaves and dug up a small part of the root. It is so bitter, and so aromatic. hmmmm...and so calming. It was almost hard to hike the rest of the way after munching on that root. Just wanted to stay sitting by the creek under a log on a sunny rock.



Along the trail I also saw cliff full of growing Huechera plants, Alum root. And of course, there were so many big old ponderosa pines just begging to be hugged. Stopped and hugged 3 or 4 of them for several minutes. I know, i 'actually" hug trees?? It isn't just a silly label for an environmentalist? No, i do actually hug trees...have you?? There is something magical about quieting the mind and opening you body and heart to a tree....arms wide open and holding this amazing, huge, ancient living being, pumping life from the ground to the leaves through its sturdy trunk. I could just sink into the trunk of the tree, and feel that life flowing upward through me as well....I tell the tree many things, give my gratitude for its life and presence, and open my heart to feel the tree, and what the tree has to say to me. I come away from a tree hug with peace and renewed strength.
After a long trudge uphill, came to an exposed outcropping of sunbaked granite rocks...these rocks were huge, mostly flat and perfect for shedding layers of clothing and shoes and just bathing in the sun, and soaking in the years of earth energy in the crystals of the rocks, listening to the wind in the trees, with eyes closed.

these are the moments i appreciate so much when i'm outside, when i feel so connected with life, earth and so at peace. i feel that all is right...stress and repetive thoughts fall away out of my head and my mind is quiet and open....

When i came home i shared some posole and pecan pie with my hiking partner, and then headed to casbah to meet a new friend. This guy had just graduated from college, and doesnt have much real world experience. Didn't know how to cook much other than eggs. Hrmmm....

I came home late and headed to bed, tired and ready to drift off into the dreamworld.

Posole and Fall Festivness

I'm definately getting into the mood for fall festiveness!! The fall equinox was on Thursday, and I spent the evening alone in a canyon with my thoughts, the trees, and the setting sun. It was easy to think of all the things that are dying, and returning to the earth with the closure of summer. There are rewards i've harvested this year too, but many things i've had to let go of and let go back to the Mother. As the sun set I sang a song of letting go to the canyon walls.
Tonight, and most of the week i've been feeling autumn approaching. I can tell when i start to crave warm comfort foods, stews, baked squashes, apple pie, apple cider, baked goods, the smell of cinnamon and clove. Yup...my body is definately tuning into the autumn energy.
Tonight, I made homemade Posole for the first time. It isn't complicated, and simply delicious and warming and perfect for autumn in the southwest. Tender chunks of pork, roasted green chiles, hardy posole corn...in a rich broth, served with warm corn tortillas and a dallop of sour cream or plain yogurt.
I actually made a huge pot of this stew, and since no one was able to join me for dinner for the evening, I put half of it in a freezer container to defrost some wintery cold night when i dont feel like cooking! It will make a super breakfast too, with scrambled eggs and potatoes.

After dinner I broke out the fall decorations, orange candles, leafy garlands of orange and red, bundles of multicolored indian corn....
I do so love autumn! Soon mulled cider to warm the mornings...and pumpkins...and PUMPKIN PIE!!!

Sadness

Tonight, I'm feeling a bit sad and lonely. Melancholy and feeling the loss of relationship in particular. Spending evenings at home alone makes me prone to feeling the loss more. Usually I'm too busy to mope, but I'm too pooped out to do much of anything else tonight.
I picked up my rooom a bit, organized some papers, had some junk food dinner with my roomate, and watched a funky movie called "saved" with that macauly kid from Home Alone. He grew up...it was a wierd teen flick about born again christian teens....rhm....and the rebel teens who break all the rules. Humorous, but frightening at the same time.

I rode my bike this morning, 40 miles *pant pant pant* I haven't ridden that far in months...but i figure if i can ride 40 on no training at all..i SHOULD be able to ride 60 with some training come november and el tour de tucson. Just have to raise 100$ to pay the entry fee....

I'm going birding tomorrow with a friend in the morning. Will be the first time for me actually looking for birds, though i've hung around a few bird loving types recently. Probably do me well to learn the birds and the songs....

I think i'll retire to bed now....i have an early morning, and i'm bumming...
good night!

Singing to the Canyon

Today, I sang to the canyon....at the top of my lungs, and listened to the canyon walls singing back at me! Oooooooooooooooooooooooooeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeew.
:)
It made me so happy, and it so freeing to open up your mouth and SING!
I felt i said hello and goodbye to the walls of the canyon as never before. We communicated more than ever...as the sun went down, dusk fell and the birds began their twilight songs.
Ahhh....

Bad Plant Mommy

I'm a bad plant mommy!! I've neglected my plants all week long and some were wilted beyond belief, though i hope not beyond repair.... so so bad!!!
:(
THis week has been insanely busy, though i'm not entirely sure why. Having my mom as company over the weekend did throw off my usual schedule....

havent' been able to ride my bike at all this week either. Though i plan to go thursday and friday morning. Maybe sunday, but i might just hike on sunday.

I'm planning to on a hike tomorrow evening at sunset, to get some quiet time outside at the end of my work week. I happen to have friday off, since my monday was an insane mishmash of rotating 14 day, 10 day, and weekly schedules all coinciding on one day.
My roomate is making chinese dinner tonight, congee and little bok choi type vegetables, with "thousand year old eggs" :) sounds wierd eh?? But i'm excited to try it!!

On other positive notes, I got an e mail this week from a publisher in town, whose interested in having me submit a proposal for a small gifty type book on southwestern Herbs!! COOL no!!
So i've got to do a one page synopsis for her and get it out to her ASAP....along with my much delayed seasonal newsletter. Today was the equinox too...and i haven't celebrated it at all. I guess tomorrow night's hike might have to do.
I did invite along the guy i went to mexico with, but i dont know if he will come or not....so, if not, i'll just make it my own personal equinox hike. maybe bring my drum along too...

:)
I hope to make posole this weekend too!!

Celebrations

Last night my mom, who drove down to Tucson, to visit me this weekend, celebrated her Croning, with me and some friends down here. There was of course food, fizzy drinks, drumming and firelight under the full moon. Today is her birthday...I unfortunately I had to work all day long, but we're going out to celebrate tonight at a new restaurant, called Acacia.

The weather got hot again. I was going to try to do evening hikes this week, but....100 plus degrees deters me still...even though it cools off at night. I'm hoping to get up into the Pinaleno Mtns one more time before winter comes.

Wednesday wednesday...

It's wednesday...that means it is the middle of the week...the work week is half way done!
It also means i start work at 7 am. Bleh...but then i get done around 1...so i wont complain TOO much.
I have friday off this week, Horaay! and mY mom is coming to visit me. Hooray!
What else is new. I'm pondering the idea of actually signing up for el tour de tucson again this year. But perhaps the 67 mile ride, NOT the 111 mile one. I'm not prepared to train THAT much. but if i do sign up, i need to get my rear in gear and RIDE! That means i need to ride on weekends too, long.
Getting up early is still challenging, but it is getting cooler at night now, so evening rides are possible.
Who knows...it is on my mind....along with perhaps searching for a new job?
it is a thought.

Weekend trip to Sonora

So, I got to make a trip down to Sonora, Mexico this weekend to see an amazing riparian canyon that was full of an astounding mix of Sonoran desert and tropical thornscrub plants, and the riparian lushness of perennial flowing water. I'm not much of a birder myself yet, as I couldn't tell you a raven from a crow, BUT I went along with some pretty experienced birders who got to see a lot of amazing birds too in this place. We left Tucson in the late afternoon and drove down and arrived late to our rondevouz point. We set up camp next to a little pond/lake, ate dinner and fled from the mosquitos.
We were up early the next day to hike into canyon while it was still cool outside. I woke up to a soaking wet sleeping bag. I spent the night outside, without my tent, and sweat my brains out in the bag, it was so warm, but talk about tropical moisture in the air. The water condensed on all surfaces in a thick, wet coat. Of course, it meant it was going to be muggy later on.
We saw some amazing plants too, flowers, butterflies....passionflower, wild chiltepines, bursera, lysiloma trees, even palms, rock figs and organ pipe cactus.
I dozed in the curve of a rock and then when we hiked back to the cars we all took a swim in the lake to cool off. Talk about a nice way to spend the weekend! To top it off, the guy who invited me along is really awsome. Really knowledgable about plants, and birds and all things of the Sonoran desert, really attractive, and REALLY nice. I'm definatley into him.




Sonoran Thornscrub on a hillside

Late Summer Rain

Last night, I spent a couple of hours making an awsome italian white bean soup with potatoes and kale and sausage for dinner. my guests, a friend of mine, and a classmate of Ting's both bailed on us at th elast minute.
I guess that means more food for us. Which is good, since it was amazing soup! I've outdone myself!
i had a few too many drinks though, and went to bed and didn't sleep a wink really.
A big jar of black tea with ginger came with me today on my travels out to three points and then to the dentist.
i"m done with fillings for the time being, but still need a couple of crowns and my wisdom teeth pulled...ick!
For dinner tonight Ting and I went to her friend Steve's house, and he grilled yams and pork loin . Pretty good eats...

I was invited on a little trip down to mexico for quick trip to a wild canyon with lots of plants this weekend, and will be leaving late tomorrow afternoon. I'm stoked. Not only do i get to go see plants and get out in soem wild beautiful country, but i'm going with a really cool guy who is into native plants and nature, and will get to meet some other naturey type folk. and get to be in mexico. maybe put that 8 yrs of spanish back to work for a while.

It rained today, much unexpectedly, on my part. monsoon season is mostly over, but there were clouds building up in the east, and by 4 pm it was dumping buckets of water over central tucson. I got soaked in teh 30 seconds it took to walk to my car from the building i was in. I LOVE it when it rains here. i dont mind getting wet at all....such a gift to hav ethe rain...i'd love to dance in it, and let rain wash over me and make me all wet and alive with feeling it.

Camarones Diablos

Tonight, I felt inspired in the kitchen. In my newfound freedom, I can cook ANYTHING I like...no matter what. I can experiment, make wierd things, and enjoy MORE of the creations that turn out well.

SO...in that light, I decided to make Shrimp Diablo. This is a recreation of Shrimp Diablo that i had in Guerneville, CA. Sonoma County. My ex and I used to visit his mother there, but since she's since moved, and I'm no longer in the family anyway, I doubt I'll be visiting that awsome mexican restaurant any time in the near future. But the shrimp diablo was to die for, served with hot corn tortillas and rice and beans and cold Jarritos soda.
So while scrounging the fridge to figure out what i'd have for dinner, i saw my roomates frozen shrimp....and an idea formed in my head.
With promises to save her some, i asked Ting if I could use her shrimp. SO....into the skillet it went...a pinch of this, and pinch of that....
success!! Shrimp Diablo a la Darcey with wild purslane greens (no beans handy at the moment).

Shrimp Diablo
2 tbsp butter
4 cloves garlic
1/2 diced red bell pepper
1 tsp each of cumin and coriander seeds, ground fine
1/4 tsp oregano leaf
1/4 tsp del arbol HOT chile powder
1/2 tsp Santa Cruz MILD chile powder
salt to taste
12 shrimp ( i used the kind with the shell still on. save yourself the trouble by buying shelled shrimp)
3/4 c strained diced canned tomatoes
splash of lime juice
6 corn tortillas, heated

Melt butter in skillet ( i like to use cast iron) and sautee garlic, spices and bell peppers for 7-10 minutes on medium low heat. Add shrimp and cook, stirring frequently for 5 min. Add the tomatoes and cook for an additional 5 minutes. If you like it a bit saucier, dont strain your tomatoes before adding them. Add salt and black pepper to taste. splash with lime juice before serving, or garnish each plate with wedge of lime for splashing on as needed.

Serve hot over the warm tortillas. Warning, this is addictively good, this will serve two, but if your hungry, or uncontrollable, you'll finish this much by yourself. Also, warning,...this is spicy...it is shrimp diablo after all! You can adjust the heat level if you want to tone it down or tone it up. These are rough estimates anyway on quantity, since i tend toward a pinch of this and a dash of that.

Cayenne and paprika will work in place of the chile powders i used, which are available at Native Seeds/Search www.nativeseeds.org. In fact, I bet even tapatio hot sauce would do in a pinch....

Playing the Guitar

Now that I have so much more time alone on my hands these days, I decided to pick up the guitar again. Yeah, i've picked up the guitar 3 or 4 times in my life, and got a little better each time I started playing it, but then put it down for whatever reason..too much homework, to hard to travel with....too tired, to involved with other people...
whatever my excuse was...i stopped playing for one reason or another. So, I dusted off the old case of my Estrella classical guitar. The one that my mom learned to play on when she was 19 yrs old, and she met my father when they were camp counselors. I had a picture of them once...my parents as kids, and in love. Sweet.
So this guitar is really old, but really sweet. my momma fixed it up for me years ago...i think as a college going away gift. It's been with me through thick and thin.


I gave away my electronic keyboard this past year to Josh's nephew, thinking i'd probably never use it again, seeing how josh had a nicer one if i WANTED to use it.
Now I have no keyboard...but i still have the 6 string....maybe it's finally time to learn to play enough to have some fun??
It feels like a long way off....since i'm starting at the beginning of book 1 again. But, even though the callouses on my fingers wore off years ago, my finger still remember a few things about playing.
I'd forgotten most of the chords, but remembered most of the single notes, and i can still play the songs i once knew...like TUMBALALAIKA and God rest ye Merry Gentelmen.
I'll breeze through book 1 in no time. 3o minutes a day? like in middle school band??
30 minutes doesn't seem too much to ask, considering how many minutes i waste checking e mail incessantly.

I decided this weekend that i can't squander away my hours off work doing meaningless web surfing and zoning out. I really need to make the most of the time i have to myself, doing things to nurture my heart and spirit, like playing the guitar. which is something Ive ALWAYS wanted to be able to do...to play, and sing my heart out.

Josh just came by on his bike to say hi, and give me a hug. That was nice. He was sweaty and hot. It's 97 degrees out there and he's on his bike. I rode at 530am...it was 77 degrees then. me thinks i got the better deal.

I'm exhausted from my 7 hr work day * for shame* but it's back to work i go. But it's work that i love. I'll be mixing herbal potions. :)

Crying for Mother

Last night I dreamed of my ex, as if we were still together, and running this compound together. Wierd, and then i dreamed i had two evil roomates, who had small children coming over, and I was expecting my own child (pregnant) soon. One of them went into the bathroom to check to make sure it was childproof. Then she proceeded to push all my stuff on top of the toilet off. Fragile things, a mirror, candles, and a really special blue candleholder my mom gave me. It broke into a million pieces on the floor.
i was so upset. I told her that it meant so much to me, because it was a gift from my mother during a time in my life that was so hard, and from which i was still healing from. ( i.e. my breakup in RL). I began crying for my mother....hysterically. I called on the phone, and there was no answer....In my dream my screams and cries were causing these cactus flowers to bloom...

i woke up rather emotional and choked up. what about this crying out for mother and the blooming cactus flower? It ws sort of surrealistic... like a Dali painting.... just these blooming flowers, changing colors and shapes, and me crying out for mother....

was i crying for my biological mother? or was it my earth mother?? Mother....why do we cry out for our mothers so fiercely?? and why was i so upset about the broken candle holder?? because it's a connection to my past? Something i need to let go of perhaps. Were the evil roomates really evil? Or helping me to push away the old , what it not needed, to make room for the new child...the new creations due in my life???
I am having a hard time letting go of the past....i feel like i'm getting worse, not better, in regards to my relatinship ending. I thought progress came in time....but, perhaps progress is ebb and flow? Up and down?
I feel so much greif at the ending of dreams and plans...that were perhaps fantasy anyway... new plans and dreams have yet to be birthed. it feels like a miscarriage...grieving for the promise of the future taken away unexpectedly.

i spent the weekend among the pine trees and flowers at 9000 ft on Mt Graham...i was reminded to be more like a tree....not to forget that trees start out small too, and spend much time rooting deep in the earth before growing tall and spreading their arms. It's time to root deep into the earth, and appreciate each day for the gift that it is.... and greive, and heal, and move on... find my dreams and birth them.... get rid of the old to make room.

Tumamoc Hill Walk

My roomate and I walked up Tumamoc hill at sunset tonight.

As is usual, a stunning light show as the sun dipped below the peaks and illuminated the clouds with pink, orange and purple. I fed my roomate a fresh prickly pear cactus, and we mused on our newly single lifestyle.

The walk was a nice close to a rather tedious and emotionally tumultuous day. I'm in a rut at work, and was feeling miserable and sorry for myself and lonely...but the walk helped to put things in perspective, and to calm a busy mind run amuck. The sunset was so peaceful, so many people out and enjoying the cool evening temperatures. 4 yrs in tucson and i'd never been up there.

I guess it's good to be single. I get to do things with my friends I'd never do with my ex partner.

AND my roomate is an awsome cook, when we came home late, instead of making a roast chicken, she whipped up some awsome chinese noodle soup, with a poached egg, shrimp, and spinach. Spicy too. Started to sweat. Yum!